Yellow Wallpaper

She wanted the yellow wallpaper. Why? It was ugly. I can‘t imagine a worse thing to put on a wall. Out of the eighty-odd wallpapers I sell, the yellow one outsells all of the others combined. And it‘s hideous. Just plain hideous! It looks bad. And everyone wants some. Why?

The customer I was selling to now just wanted the yellow wallpaper. I was trying to steer her away from it, but she was adamant. It doesn‘t even cost less than the other papers. In another attempt to divert her away from the horrendous paper, I told her, “Now, the wallpaper you‘re looking to buy is my most popular paper. (the truth.) But my supplies of it are dwindling (not the truth), and I‘m thinking to raise the price (more of the truth) due to unavailability (not the truth).“

“Whatever it costs, I‘ll buy it.“

I collapsed on the sofa. “Are you sure? I think some blue or the water lilly pattern would suit this room better…“

“No, I want the yellow.“

That was it. I‘d blown the sale. I ended up selling the yellow wallpaper again. Terrible.

I made a pretty penny off that sale, but only because of my price hike. Dang it, I was making people‘s homes uglier, and they were paying me to do it. This is terrible. And it‘s been going on for eight years. Ever since I started this job. But only the yellow wallpaper. I‘m fine with the others.

I work for a small “wallpaper squad,” as we call it. The squad consists of five people: Me, who sells the wallpaper; Jim, Joe, and Thom, who install the wallpaper; and Arthur, who financially manages the thing. We‘re all good at what we do. I just wish that I didn‘t have to sell the yellow paper. It‘s terrible! Well, let me put it this way: You know how bad I‘ve been saying it is? Well, that‘s how bad it is.

Over the entire course of my career, I‘ve sold almost 500 different kinds of wallpaper. Some of them have bombed, others succeeded. But the original wallpaper I still sell is the yellow wallpaper. The ugly, stupid wallpaper. In my bedroom, I have a sample of wallpaper from every kind I‘ve every sold. EXCEPT the yellow kind.

Part of the deal when I entered the business was that I‘d get a free wallpapering. I couldn‘t decide which paper to put up, so I had them put up all eight different kinds. The yellow bothered me so much, I had it taken down. Over time, we‘ve expanded our selection at a given time to eighty, and the collection on my walls has grown. It‘s a wonderful sensation to look around and take in all the splashes of color pasted to the wall. Soon the collage will cover the ceiling.

If only it wasn‘t for the…well, you know. It‘s ruining my happiness. If it weren‘t for that paper, I would be content. I‘ve tried to cancel the line, but when talking to Arthur about it, it becomes apparent that if the yellow line was cancelled, we wouldn‘t be able to make ends meet. The darned yellow paper! If only I could get rid of it.

by Kevin, Central High School
12/05